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The Tragedy of Pudd'nhead Wilson, Kap. 16
Original engl.: "If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man."
The Tragedy of Pudd'nhead Wilson
A Tramp Abroad, Appendix D, Die schreckliche deutsche Sprache (The Awful German Language)
Original engl.: "I went often to look at the collection of curiosities in Heidelberg Castle, and one day I surprised the keeper of it with my German. I spoke entirely in that language. He was greatly interested; and after I had talked a while he said my German was very rare, possibly a »unique«; and wanted to add it to his museum."
A Tramp Abroad, Appendix D, The Awful German Language
„Der Bericht über meinen Tod war eine Übertreibung.“
New York Journal, 2. Juni 1897
Original engl.: "The report of my death was an exaggeration."; meist zitiert als: "The report of my death has been greatly exaggerated."
Mark Twain, a Biography
Collected Tales, Sketches, Speeches, and Essays 1852-1890
Original engl.: "If another citizen preferred to toy with death, and buy health in small parcels, to bribe death with a sugar pill to stay away, or go to the grave with all the original sweetners undrenched out of him, then the individual adopted the like »cures like« system, and called in a homeopath physician as being a pleasant friend of death's."
Andere
„Zuerst schuf Gott die Idioten. Das war zur Übung. Dann schuf er die Schulverwaltung.“
Following the Equator, chapter LXI
Original engl.: "In the first place God made idiots. This was for practice. Then He made School Boards."
Following the Equator
Variante: Zuerst schuf Gott die Idioten. Das war zur Übung. Dann schuf er die Verlags-Lektoren.