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“You aspired to be God’s advocate, you got the job, you performed admirably. But God’s advocate was ipso facto my advocate. Theodicy’s a sucker’s game, Professor. When Yahweh was operational, humanity’s obligation wasn’t to worship Him, for chrissakes. It was to celebrate His creativity and stand forevermore opposed to His malice. And anybody such as yourself, anybody who sought to shoehorn an omnibenevolent God into the same universe as Auschwitz...that person, Dr. Gregory Francis Lovett—that person did the Devil’s work for him.”

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James K. Morrow

Quelle: Blameless in Abaddon (1996), Chapter 15 (p. 391; spoken by the Devil)

“I am what I am. I am Christ and Antichrist, God and Satan, Heaven and Hiroshima, Arcadia and Auschwitz.” Smiling devilishly, Sarkos lumbered up to Lovett. “Get it, fat boy? God is a duality. Dr. Jehovah and Mr. Hyde.” He lobbed the bottle cap into his mouth and chewed. “Allow me to tell you a bedtime story. It’s called ‘The Day the Gas Chambers Malfunctioned at Auschwitz.’ On second thought, why bother? You know the plot—the title gives it away—I’m surprised Braverman and Kelvin left it out of their overblown epic. Can you imagine how it feels to be a seven-year-old Jewish child, standing in line with hundreds of other Jewish children, waiting your turn to be thrown alive onto an open fire?”

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James K. Morrow

Swallowing the bottle cap, Sarkos swerved toward Martin. “Don’t you see? It’s the only solution that can possibly work. No other theory comes close. Of course God has a dark side. Not just dark—evil. Radically, radically evil.”
Quelle: Blameless in Abaddon (1996), Chapter 15 (p. 390; spoken by the Devil, named Jonathan Sarkos in the book)

“Do you really think your terrestrial counterpart is living in the best of all possible worlds? Where I come from, an eighth grader would be ashamed to enter planet Earth in a junior high school science fair.”

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James K. Morrow

Quelle: Blameless in Abaddon (1996), Chapter 15 (p. 387)

“To close the gap between jurisprudence and justice would require a canon of a hundred million laws.”

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James K. Morrow

Quelle: Blameless in Abaddon (1996), Chapter 15 (p. 383)

“How’re you feeling?”

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James K. Morrow

“I highly recommend cancer. It’s worth it just for the drugs.”
Quelle: Blameless in Abaddon (1996), Chapter 14 (p. 361)

“If nothing else, their adventure had proved that God was not about to put science out of business.”

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James K. Morrow

Quelle: Blameless in Abaddon (1996), Chapter 11 (p. 259)

“Although covetousness is not my only flaw, it seems to cause me more pain than all my other sins combined.”

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James K. Morrow

Quelle: Blameless in Abaddon (1996), Chapter 11 (p. 255; spoken by the Devil)

“Asia gave us dowry deaths and the caste system. Africa elevated famine to an art form. North America cultivated chattel slavery for far longer than I would have dared hope; South America has done things with political oppression that I am obliged to call brilliant; Australia showed the world that the only good aborigine is a dead aborigine; and Antarctica has fabulous weather. Of all the continents that constitute Earth’s terrain, however, Europe remains dearest to my heart and closest to my soul.
I allude here not to the sweatshops, the world wars, or totalitarian socialism (though none of these innovations has escaped my notice) but to the fact that the European imagination endowed me with a degree of glamour—you might even say charm—that in pre-coma times enabled me to function with extraordinary effectiveness. The concept of an Evil One is intrinsic to Islam, of course; the ancient Hebrews had their “adversary,” their satan; the Egyptians feared a dark deity called Set; Zoroastrians believed in Ahriman, essence of destruction (forever warring with Ohrmazd, source of all things bright and beautiful). But only in Christian Europe did the Prince of Hell acquire a personality as vivid and endearing as any you will meet in a Dickens novel.”

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James K. Morrow

Quelle: Blameless in Abaddon (1996), Chapter 11 (p. 253; spoken by the Devil)

“I stand before you today not as your hypothetical descendant but as the ambassador of my kind. The statistics, as you may know, are appalling: two of us sloughed off for every six who make it into the world. In all of history, there was never a more prolific abortionist than God Almighty. Make sure the tribunal learns that fact.”

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James K. Morrow

Quelle: Blameless in Abaddon (1996), Chapter 10 (p. 234)

“Don’t get testy with me, sir. I am Augustine of Hippo Regius, discoverer of concupiscence. Between my legs hangs the axis on which will turn the brave new world of Christian antieroticism.”

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James K. Morrow

Quelle: Blameless in Abaddon (1996), Chapter 7 (p. 171)

“You should be talking to a doctor of theology, not a Father of Lies. The distinction is subtle but real.”

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James K. Morrow

Quelle: Blameless in Abaddon (1996), Chapter 7 (p. 154; spoken by the Devil)

“For many citizens of the Western world, this situation proved, as you might imagine, troubling—especially in the United States, where reality has never enjoyed a great deal of prestige.”

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James K. Morrow

Quelle: Blameless in Abaddon (1996), Chapter 6 (p. 129; spoken by the Devil)

“Never underestimate the value of a falsehood, friends. Never doubt the power of a lie. Blessed are the mendacious, for they shall grow wealthy beyond their wildest dreams.”

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James K. Morrow

Quelle: Blameless in Abaddon (1996), Chapter 2 (p. 42; spoken by the Devil)

“I am the Father of Lies. Over the years, my children have done me proud. I shouldn’t play favorites, but I am especially pleased with “The meek shall inherit the earth.” Likewise, I shall always retain a soft spot in my heart for “Every cloud has a silver lining.””

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James K. Morrow

As for “Time heals all wounds” and “Whenever God closes a door, He opens a window”—they, too, make me gloat unconscionably.
Quelle: Blameless in Abaddon (1996), Chapter 1 (p. 13; spoken by the Devil)