Terry Pratchett: Zitate auf Englisch (seite 17)

“I staggered into a Manchester bar late one night on a tour and the waitress said "You look as if you need a Screaming Orgasm". At the time this was the last thing on my mind…”

“He felt that the darkness was full of unimaginable horrors - and the trouble with unimaginable horrors was that they were only too easy to imagine…”

“… people didn't seem to be able to remember what it was like with the elves around. Life was certainly more interesting then, but usually because it was shorter. And it was more colorful, if you liked the color of blood.”

“And, as always happens, and happens far too soon, the strange and wonderful becomes a memory and a memory becomes a dream. Tomorrow it's gone.”

“You just put that sword away, sir, please," said the voice of Lance-Constable Vimes.
"You will not shoot me, you young idiot. That would be murder," said the captain calmly.
"Not where I'm aiming, sir.”

“Students, eh? Love 'em or hate 'em, you can't hit them with a shovel!”

“Mind you, the Elizabethans had so many words for the female genitals that it is quite hard to speak a sentence of modern English without inadvertently mentioning at least three of them.”

“Modesty is only arrogance by stealth.”

“Everywhere's been where it is ever since it was first put there. It's called geography.”

“… William wondered why he always disliked people who said 'no offense meant.' Maybe it was because they found it easier to to say 'no offense meant' than actually to refrain from giving offense.”

“One day a tortoise will learn how to fly.”

“Most of the great triumphs and tragedies of history are caused not by people being fundamentally good or fundamentally evil, but by people being fundamentally people.”

“It was the living who ignored the strange and wonderful, because life was too full of the boring and mundane.”

“The Kraken stirs. And ten billion sushi dinners cry out for vengeance.”

“Verence would rather cut his own leg off than put a witch in prison, since it'd save trouble in the long run and probably be less painful.”

“Two types of people laugh at the law: those that break it and those that make it.”

“Someone out there was about to find that their worst nightmare was a maddened Librarian. With a badge.”

“Never trust a species that grins all the time. It’s up to something.”

“His movements could be called cat-like, except that he did not stop to spray urine up against things.”