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Kathleen Mary „Kathy“ Griffin ist eine US-amerikanische Schauspielerin, Synchronsprecherin, TV-Producerin und Stand-up-Comedian. Wikipedia  

✵ 4. November 1960
Kathy Griffin Foto
Kathy Griffin: 69 Zitate0 Gefällt mir

Kathy Griffin: Zitate auf Englisch

“(Recalling her conversation with Anna Nicole Smith eating lunch) All of a sudden, she takes a bite of something and she goes like this (makes a disgusted face) "I don't lahk it." I go, "What's the matter, honey?" and she goes "I don't lahk it. I thought it was mashed pataters." PA-TAY-TERS! I heard it with my own ears. PATATERS. Britney probably wants to marry her now. So, anyway, I looked on her plate and said, "No, it's polenta" and, I swear to God, she looks at me and goes "Pimento?" I said, "No, that's an olive. "Polenta"”

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Kathy Griffin

it's like mushed-up cornmeal." She goes, "I don't lahk it. I thought..." Mashed pateters, I got it.
The D-list (2004)

“You've got the two titans. Streisand. Oprah. Both strong black women.”

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Kathy Griffin

Is... Not Nicole Kidman (2005)

“I saw Courtney Love have one of her heroin fits…. and break a guitar. So I pulled up a chair. What? You gotta be ring-side!”

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Kathy Griffin

The D-list (2004)

“Cause you know my joke is that I love her (Oprah Winfrey) but she thinks she's Jesus? And when she gets a paper cut she's like "Oh, stigmata?". No, Oprah. Get off the cross and do your show!”

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Kathy Griffin

Strong Black Woman (2006)

“Elin Nordegren could not be happier. How many girls here would trade places with her in a second? Where do I sign? First of all, she doesn't have to bang him (Tiger Woods) anymore! And she's probably gonna get, like $500 million! So they keep getting these pictures of her with the two kids, and she's just laughing all the way to the bank…haaa haaa haaa haaa…heugen fleugen heugen fleugen…hjorda fjorda hjorda fjorda…”

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Kathy Griffin

Whores on Crutches (2010)

“Apparently, Courtney Love was at Whitney's "intervention". And when Courtney Love is telling you, you're hittin the pipe too hard, well, things are bad! They're really bad!”

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Kathy Griffin

The D-list (2004)

“I would rather blow a guy in the bathroom at White Castle in between sliders…because I'm romantic!”

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Kathy Griffin

Straight To Hell (2007)

“Have you guys noticed that Madonna is British now? OK, let's talk about her lineage for a minute. Raised in Michigan, moved to New York, is British. She started turning British like at the Golden Globes and she was doing the interviews and she says "telly" instead of "television" and she uses the word "actually" way too much and then she's also sorta bringing her voice down to a register around here (brings her voice down) and she's being interviewed for the Golden Globes and she's got whole, you know, crazy hair that everybody hated and everybody has and they were saying, "Well, Madonna, we're so glad to have you at the Golden Globes." (speaks in Madonna British accent) "Well, actually, it is more fun to come here than watch it on the telly". You know. Look, I'm from the midwest- its a TV.”

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Kathy Griffin

Hot Cup Of Talk (1998)

“She reaches under and grabs my peech and like, squeezes it and walks away. I run over to Brooke and go "Your mother just molested me. I could sue you and own this house!"”

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Kathy Griffin

Allegedly (2004)

“When Sharon Stone asks you to do something, you just just do it. If Sharon Stone asked me to eat her poo, I'd be like "yeah, what's a good time for you?".(Pretending to eat poo) "This is really good poo Sharon, thanks".(To the audience) Stop picturing it……….. and come back!”

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Kathy Griffin

The D-list (2004)

“The first red flag? The crooked wig! That's how you know what level of awareness Whitney is at. Cause let me tell - you know her gay was straightening that wig to the bitter end. Making sure the part was in the right place. But you know what - when the (crack) pipe is shaking? It's hard to keep it on, when the pipe is all shaking.”

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Kathy Griffin

Balls of Steel (2009)

“Nothing gets me more nervous than white people who talk black……. I mean, it's fun on "Ricki Lake", but in real life……”

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Kathy Griffin

Allegedly (2004)

“And then she (Brooke Sheilds) says the ill-fated words "You have to put this in your act". And I said "What, I would never!"”

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Kathy Griffin

Because it's a private time!!
Allegedly (2004)

“Alright, Macy Gray….. what exactly is wrong with her? She, for sure has a little mental retardation. Allegedly!”

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Kathy Griffin

Allegedly (2004)

“And then who comes along to save the day? A couple of tool-belt wearing, golf-loving, Dinah Shore weekend lesbians sent from heaven.”

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Kathy Griffin

Strong Black Woman (2006)

“We didn't know that the (Jackson) family was as nuts as we're now finding out. Who knew that Michael was the normal one??”

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Kathy Griffin

Balls of Steel (2009)

“I am not gonna engage in a debate that Michael Jackson could be the biological father of any of those kids. I'm not havin it, not tonight. There's no way. Those kids are Whitey, Whitey McGee and Whitey McWhiterson!”

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Kathy Griffin

Balls of Steel (2009)

“So, Hanson, which one of you boys is coming home with me tonight? (greeting the band Hanson)”

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Kathy Griffin

Kathy Griffin: Hot Cup Of Talk http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0234018/ (1998) <br class="br">Hot Cup Of Talk (1998)

“(About gay cruising) My gays had to school me, and they said there's a whole system and a language to the tapping. One tap means you're a top, two means you're a bottom….. I don't know, it's very elaborate. Very elaborate.”

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Kathy Griffin

Straight To Hell (2007)

“(describing Celine Dion's family of 14 siblings) You know there is just issues and boundries and secrets. The name of my book.”

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Kathy Griffin

Hot Cup Of Talk (1998)

“I know that Lindsay (Lohan) has lost a lot of weight recently, due to diet, Pilates and crack. Without the diet and Pilates.”

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Kathy Griffin

Strong Black Woman (2006)

“(On signing autographs for troops) I'd be writing To Private so and so, love Kathy Griffin and then I'd go "here, think about this when you beat off."”

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Kathy Griffin

Allegedly (2004)

“Everytime she walks out (on stage), she acts like she's shocked anyone showed up! Every night! As if every single day, at about 3 o'clock, she's like, "You know Rene, maybe tonight iz ze night zey do not come?"”

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Kathy Griffin

Strong Black Woman (2006)

“So then, I go to this other guy who's just a civilian guy and minding his own business and I go to him like this "Burka - NO"! "Burka - BAD!"”

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Kathy Griffin

Like he's one of my dogs!
Allegedly (2004)

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