George Ouzounian Zitate (69 Zitate, seite 2)

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“i hope that earns me some eprops (proper recognition in an electronic form lol) LOL LOL LOL!!!”

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Maddox

The Best Page in the Universe, April Fools

“What are the odds that a simple geometric folding of a $20 bill with elements of design that were conceived in 1928 by a committee of treasurers, a full 42 years before the World Trade Center even existed, could accidentally contain a representation of both terror attacks? Pretty good, apparently.”

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Maddox

There is no 9/11 conspiracy you morons. http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=911_morons
The Best Page in the Universe

“Finally when the movie started, I thought the bullshit ads were over, but no. First thing they showed was a "coke break" sponsored and produced by coke. […] I paid $7 for a movie, NOT FOR BULLSHIT ADVERTISEMENTS.”

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I paid $7.00 for a movie... http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=moviebs
The Best Page in the Universe

“My Nuts are just under critical mass, a few inches away from collapsing into a super dense vortex of nutsaqutron (a type of radiation given off by enormous balls).”

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My balls are huge. http://maddox.xmission.com/c.cgi?u=balls_are_huge
The Best Page in the Universe

“"my friend and i were watching mtv the other day when nelly came on and my friend was like "omg nelly rules". hes such an idiot, he only listens to trendy music. at least i like original stuff like beyonce.”

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Maddox

lol @ fox for laugh out loud sundays! http://maddox.xmission.com/c.cgi?u=af_fox
The Best Page in the Universe, April Fools

“If women ran the world, we'd still be searching for the wheel.”

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Maddox

Twenty-six things a perfect guy would do, and other propaganda disseminated by misguided women. http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=26_things
The Best Page in the Universe

“There are very few people who look good in red lipstick, and those people usually juggle for a living.”

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Maddox

Fashion tips for women from a guy who knows dick about fashion. http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=fashion
The Best Page in the Universe

“I don't get it: they re-package the same shitty football games every year, update a few stats, call it a new game and millions of suckers keep buying them. What's the point? Why not just go outside and play real football instead? Or even better yet, get bent. Nobody likes football.”

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Maddox

Ikaruga kicks ass http://maddox.xmission.com/c.cgi?u=ikaruga
The Best Page in the Universe

“There's no shame in masturbation, unless you get caught.”

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Maddox

We know you're a cranky bitch, you don't need the bumper sticker. http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=stupid_bitch
The Best Page in the Universe

“Kenley is alleged to have sexually assaulted her eleven-year-old stepson, then ditched out on bond. The FBI says Kenley has ties to Arkansas. Talk about trying to find a needle in a hay stack.”

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Maddox

The Best Page in the Universe

“No, I'm not a democrat or a republican. I'm just a guy who's tired of the bullshit.”

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Maddox

The Best Page in the Universe

“If you've ever wondered what someone who's horny enough to pay a bunch of adolescents $5000 in cash in exchange for some action looks like, take a good look at Ms. Walker's picture. Three words: battery operated dildo. Or if you happen to be a stickler for brevity like I am, just one word: cucumber. Because, damn.”

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Maddox

How to spot a pedophile http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=spot_the_pedo.
The Best Page in the Universe

“When the iPhone was first announced, CEO Steve Jobs spewed enough BS to cover a football field full of babies 3 feet deep in bullshit, which sounds cool because he could have potentially murdered a football field full of babies, but he passed on this opportunity by introducing the phone instead.”

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Maddox

The iPhone is a piece of shit, and so is your face. http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=iphone
The Best Page in the Universe

“I'm impressed that they've been able to take a 2D character with a 1D personality and bloat it into a 3D disaster.”

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Garfield sucks http://maddox.xmission.com/c.cgi?u=garfield_sucks
The Best Page in the Universe

“Imagine finding out you got rejected from community college, then finding out that your alcoholic father got arrested for domestic abuse, you lost all your life savings in a Ponzi scheme, and all of this happens to you while you're on the space shuttle Challenger. Then you wake up and it's all a bad dream, except you realize that you're at work without clothes on, and work is NASA and you're really on the space shuttle Challenger. That's what this movie is like, only infinitely worse. Everything about this movie pissed me off, save for the lesbian finger bang scene. Except even that sucked because it wasn't in the movie.”

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Maddox

Quantum of Solace is a shitpile. http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=quantum_of_phallus
The Best Page in the Universe

“Let's face it: there are few things in this world more stupid than dancing. Except break dancing, which pirates and lumber jacks would agree is awesome. Other than that, dancing makes me envy cripples.”

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The Best Page in the Universe

“Okay, here's a tip: if you're doing something creepy like molesting children, you don't need to take topless photos of yourself to seal the deal. We know, the pedosmile is enough.”

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The Best Page in the Universe

“Having spelling errors is one thing, but c'mon. I've typed out more coherent sentences with my penis.”

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The Best Page in the Universe

“The next time you ask someone how their day is going, expect, no, DEMAND a response. Don't settle for good. Demand the truth. Make them admit that they're having a shitty day, and then do your best to make it worse.”

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I Hate Small Talk http://maddox.xmission.com/smalltalk.html
The Best Page in the Universe

“I have a different stance on abortion: I'm against abortion, but for killing babies. That way everyone loses, and I win. I'm neither pro choice, nor pro life; I'm pro you-shutting-the-hell-up. The only way I'd be "pro choice" is if it meant I could choose which babies I could abort, and only then if I could lift the age restriction to 80."”

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The Best Page in the Universe

“If you got caught screwing around on the job, you'd probably get fired, and so would I. Why should he get away with it?”

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Maddox

on Bill Clinton
Grow a pair and impeach that horny bastard http://maddox.xmission.com/clinton.html
The Best Page in the Universe

“"4 example the other day i saw a black person walking down the street and i was like "omg a negro" but instead of walking on the other side i said "what would rumsfeld do?" so i stayed on the sidewalk. when he came up to me i wanted to show him that i have no problems with people of color so i said "hey" and offered him my spare change before he could even ask."”

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i love donald rumsfeld http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=af_racist
The Best Page in the Universe, April Fools

“When I say this game is hard, I mean hard like nipples-on-a-blind-lesbian-in-a-fish-market hard.”

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Maddox

The Best Page in the Universe

“Passing out while you try to kill yourself is like failing at failing.”

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Maddox

How to kill yourself like a man. http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=manly_suicide
The Best Page in the Universe

“I hate the help screen, I hate the options, I hate the card graphics, I hate the default window size, everything. I HATE SOLITAIRE.”

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Maddox

I hate Solitaire http://maddox.xmission.com/solitaire.html.
The Best Page in the Universe

“I've only had one dream in my life with kids in it that didn't involve me gnawing my feet off, and it had to do with kids doing my laundry.”

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Maddox

9 things I learned about the world according to anonymous stock photo models. http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=stock_photos
The Best Page in the Universe

“Note that the name of the show is 'Trippin' ' and not 'Tripping' because the addition of the letter 'g' would not be consistent with the views of MTV's urban youth demographic who tend to frown upon linguistic formalities such as proper enunciation. I mean, proper 'nunciation, yo!”

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Maddox

The Best Page in the Universe

“There are pigs that can manipulate joysticks, yet you morons can't even send me an intelligible email.”

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Maddox

Bullshit Fan Mail http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=ihatemail0.
The Best Page in the Universe

“Is someone you know anorexic? A good joke would be to tell them that they're fat. They'll laugh because anorexic people aren't fat. HAHAH”

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Maddox

Pranks to try on people in the hospital! http://maddox.xmission.com/c.cgi?u=jokes
The Best Page in the Universe

“If there were a building that stood for grammatical integrity, this email would be the plane that crashed into it.”

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Maddox

Wireless internet may very well destroy our chances of contacting intelligent life http://maddox.xmission.com/aliens.html.
The Best Page in the Universe